I set out the new year with a plan to create a regimented schedule to assure I would get things done. Turns out I not only need a schedule, but I need to stick with it! That's craziness.
I want to work more seriously on my web series, mainly writing it and getting the pilot episode polished up so I can use it to get funding for the rest of the season. Turns out other people aren't hiring me for my dream job, so I have to conjure it up. I am getting hired for other (non-paying) roles, which take up some time, especially when one is an obscure Shakespeare work.
Work, that's taking up time too, the job, the thing that gives me money and health insurance. Then family and friends. You know, those things that make life happen. I've let all that fog up my path and I've slowed down to a crawl making sure I don't run into anything in a blind run. I think that might be the wrong approach (or at least not the best one). I cannot wait for the fog to lift to keep going. I need to pretend like I know where the road goes already. What I need to do is the scary thing and keep on running into the unknown, knowing it's the right way.
Maybe this is "the wall" all runners who finish the race go through. It's not a solid thing that tangibly blocks your path, but more of an atmosphere that you knew would be there, but are still surprised at finding yourself enveloped by. Okay then wall; you can stay right where you're at, but I am not. You don't need to do anything, I'm just going to run right through you.
Deal with it.
If I hit a tree, it happens. It won't kill me (unless, maybe if it's a whomping willow). One thing I do know, I'm not going to fall off anything. There's ground under my feet and I'm about to discover more every step of the way.
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