Thursday, May 19, 2011


When is it appropriate to respond to a question with "Yes...but only when I'm drunk." ?

Monday, May 9, 2011

Informational Indigestion

I consume media like a glutton. I used to call it research, as I was focusing on improv I wanted to be able to reference any bit of media that existed. However, I realize that now it is difficult for me to just be alone with myself and not consuming to escape being with myself. I think I have indigestion from all the media I've consumed. However, I don't want to stop. I'm slowing down, but I still crave more. I'd rather just take tums than change my diet. ...yep, definitely American of me.

Saturday, May 7, 2011


I was playing with two separate pairs of cats last night at different friend's houses. I realized that when you have two cats, you always have one that's social and one that's not. One that is fat and one that is skinny. They can be any combination of those binary options, but that's pretty much it.

I also had an epiphany that most (but luckily not all) cats act pretty much like jilted lovers. They want to show you that they do not need anyone else in response to some hurt they received in a former life. The try and make you want to play with them and stroke them, but they will not show interest in you unless you are showing your own interest elsewhere. Then, when they do give in and ask for attention, they may lose themselves in a moment of enjoyment, but the second they realize that they let themselves open up to you, they slam the wall up again, scratch or hiss at you, then run off, just to prove that they operate independently, and it was in fact you that needed them, and must try to win them back.

Either that or I'm projecting.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Final moments of perfection

My dorm rooms in college were pretty epic. Hammocs and bean-bag love seats aside, the entertainment center and very effective mood lighting including a disco ball, lava lamps and gel projector set a nice social atmosphere. With all the accoutrement, I spent the whole year making small adjustments and adding things here and there to improve the digs. I never felt fully satisfied with the space until the very day before I moved out. I always found the perfect thing just in time to set it up, admire it, then begin to disassemble the work, ready to move on.

There's a pattern for me. Things inevitably achieving perfection only the moment before they change. Either that, or I am only comfortable moving on when things feel good to me.

So yeah, maybe I need to get myself in order before I move out or even "meet someone," which is still odd as a concept. All that time setting up my dorm rooms I never really planned for moving out, that would only delay any move toward improving the space as it was. I just made small steps every day until I had to stop. I guess focusing on the now helped me improve the future more than focusing on the inevitable. Maybe that's why people avoid thinking about death.

Imagine getting everything you wanted in life, then living another 20 years. Those would be some boring years. Everything would be set, wouldn't it be better to gain little bits as you live, making it all perfect until the moment you have to move on? Maybe that's just me. I'd rather eat casserole before cake then the other way around. That is, unless the casserole had aged white Tillamook cheddar. There I go again, I keep skipping a groove with cheese.