Sunday, August 28, 2011

I saw the sign

Today I explored LA in my car, just driving around to see what I could see. Apparently traffic is not as bad as everyone makes it out to believe...that is if you're driving on a Sunday afternoon and it's somewhere in the 100 degree mark.

I found myself not only by the UCB theater but also underneath the Hollywood sign...well, the sign pointing the way to the trail to the Hollywood sign, anyway. Not sure about the horses.

Notice the sweet hat. My first non-food purchase. Scott and I bought some sweet hats two evenings ago...after having a few fine beers first.

I regret nothing!

Friday, August 26, 2011

Writing and parking.

I just finished my writing for the day. I'm starting small with 1,000 words a day. I am still surprised at how my characters keep taking control of the story and defiantly going where they want to go rather than where I tell them I want them to go.

I am more confused by the fact that even though I am writing this one in my own voice, it still won't listen to me, and ME is IT! Human will can be quite strong. So can the smell of garlic (yesterday I was in Gilroy, the garlic capital of the world, and it does smell like it is that thing).

So nothing really funny to report yet, though it only took me 5 hours to get a parking ticket. I got one for $37 for not turning my wheels to the curb even though the road was flat and not at all hilly. I blame my Oregon plates and my drivers ed. training which taught me to always park with my wheels facing forward. Also my own stupidity for thinking parking is no longer enforced after 8pm. Apparently what is true for Portland is not true for Pasadena.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Driving to LA Day 1: near death experience

Short story,
I left Roy at 5am and drove to Gilroy, CA. arriving at 5pm. The drive was pretty pleasant. I listened to classical until it crapped out after Salem and then NPR until Eugene made it stop, then switched to podcasts. I tired from that about the time I crossed the border into California (they apparently have a border check there, I think they were confused as to which side of the state they are supposed to guard) I turned to more techno-ish and rocky tunes. Cranking on these through California, somewhere halfway through the mid 500's (milepost marker) on I-5 something scary happened.

The truck in front of the car in the lane directly left of me swerved violently. There was recent construction work that left the left side of the highway without a shoulder and the truck veered enough into that to start him out of control. He corrected right then left then right, each time turning sharper and causing a large dust plume that hid the action from my sight for a moment until I saw him shoot straight into the oncoming traffic on the other side of the highway. The only thing dividing the two directions was some grass. Both directions of I-5 were full of cars, and the dust cloud blocked my view of the oncoming traffic as the truck shot up the grass becoming completely airborn before slamming down on the road and continuing full speed across all three lanes of oncoming traffic. Lucking it found the only pocket of non-cars and shot across the highway through the ditch on the opposite side, catapulting the truck feet into the air through a fence and landing not-so-gently in a field.

Being a responsible citizen I pulled off to the side of the road, pressed my emergency flashers and called 911. The only other cars that stopped on the whole highway were the car right next to me, who also narrowly missed being a part of the accident by sheer luck and the first car in the other direction that just missed a head-on collission at 70+mph by feet. The driver and passengers of the truck all stepped out of the vehicle, I was afraid they were hurt as the truck had quite a few aerial maneuvers meant only for pigs trained as ballerinas.

Since the 911 operator was not too interested in hearing about the event from me and the the people seemed to not be seriously injured, and the traffic just kept its status quo, I merged back into the swarm and moved on. I found myself shaking a bit. Twice earlier in the drive I had veered onto the rumble strip and corrected myself. Had I done that accidently on this stretch of the road...And then to think about how close that truck was to something seriously terrible. Seconds earlier or later and it would have been slammed side-on by multiple vehicles going 70mph, or corrected the wrong way and rolled (which it seriously threatened to do several times). I've been first on-scene to a bloody accident before, keeping a bleeding teen talking until the ambulance arrived, having him black out several times. That's an experience I am happy to have avoided today.

So all in all, California roads are a bit rougher than Oregon roads.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Monday, August 15, 2011

Taking chances?

If someone gave you a chance, would you take it?

Where would you put it?

>On the mantle.
It caught fire while you tried to make "Fireplace patties." You sob uncontrollably.
>On the refrigerator door.
You used a cheap magnet and it fell off and broke when you slammed the door
out of rage from not finding raw hamburger meat inside.

>In your mouth.
It is delicious, congratulations.

>On me.
It worked for Abba...but not for you. Now finish your vegetables and clean
the rec. room.

Go back to flipping burgers.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Last day at work.

I was waiting in line for the restrooms behind a coworker. The doors to the restrooms are not that thick, so you can usually tell where people are in the process (i.e. flushing, sink running, towel dispencer, etc.). There was clearly a man and a child in the men's room.

The door to the women's room opens up and a little girl comes out while my workmate enters that restroom. The little girl is searching around, clearly not finding who she was looking for, so I asked her if she was looking for her dad and brother. She said yes, so I told her they were probably in the other restroom. I commenced leaning against the wall with my arms crossed. Out of the corner of my eye I saw her copy my stance in wait. Then we waited. For a minute. Then another minute. After both her and I shifted stances a couple times, I leaned over and said "They're taking a long time, aren't they" to which she replied "Yeah, they both had to go number 2."

Then I heard the little boy through the door say "Bye-Bye diarhea" to which the father shushed him.