Would you lend me a Q for my A?

I think I know my issue with blogs. I can't help but feel like I am talking into a vacuum. I'm not used to that, I am used to feedback. On stage, I get instant feedback. Even if there is no sounds of laughing or coughing, I can feel when the room is focused on the story, on the moment of interaction. I hate to admit it, but as much as I pretend to be a writer (I do enjoy being on my own), I am an actor, and I need people, I need conversation, I need interaction. What I've really felt writing this blog is that while I may have an audience in mind (albeit one person, depending on my mood), I'm really writing to no one, at least that is my feeling on this end. Doesn't that sound so whiney and camp? "Ooh, poor poor me, wasting my fingers away on this cold, plastic mat, coated with the most basic elements of language with nobody to share it with." Yeah. Lame. Ignore that bit, that's the actory side of me. Now, the equally vain but deeper part of me wants this to be a dialogue, or conversation. At least less of me talking to the Great Wall of the internet.

Man, I remember my metaphors being much more intelligent. I thought doing a lot of reading today would have helped that bit. Oh well. Here's what it is: I want questions. I want to answer questions. I do have thoughts all day long, but it gets tiring answering my own questions, especially when if I know I'm the only one listening, I won't surprise myself with the answers. I only surprise myself when I'm talking with other [real] people. Like when you have a problem that's bugging you, and the second you ask someone else about it you get the answer. That's what it's like, but I am also aware that when the pressure is on, that's how writing is. When I've truly had pressure to write, the most amazing connections and solutions come out of me, because I can't rely on time and thinking, only on the moment and how brilliantly ideas coalesce, like turning coal into diamonds with heat and pressure. Then again I sometimes get ridiculously long sentences. Short ones too. For effect.

All my ramblings aside, I want questions. Whatever they are. Bring me the heat and pressure.

Extreme moderation

Improv is a lot more instant than wine. I make wine and I take improv classes. Some of my wine takes two or more years to really start to be enjoyable. Improv however, is fairly instant. Saw the level above me perform last night, and I'm amazed at how differently I watched it than other people, even other people in my class. It's the perspective, I think. A general audience watches it and sees a show, whereas I am in the category of people who watch it for the structure; how all the stories interconnect, how much the players are listening to each other and how important they make gifts they receive.

One of my things, is that my mind fairly instantly goes to an extreme, or at least to the absurd. I saw more than a few scenes go in this direction last night, which nailed down the note I got to make things more real. Basically, to keep the character and the scene grounded. When I first got this note I saw it as being grounded, but now I see it's not a restriction to what I can do, instead it's a note to help keep the audience involved and interested in the show. I can still be in space, but I still have to be grounded in space. Absurdity is still allowable, but only in extreme moderation.